One more thing....

Seem to have a flury of posts today. Snippets and pics that needed posting that I had not gotten around to. Anyway, one more thing.

RED SOX!

Did you see the game last night! Whoa BABY! Not one, not two, not THREE, but FOUR Dingers in a ROW! Eleven pitches, four hits, four runs! I was sort of watching the game, and when the b*****ds (excuse me, yankees) went ahead by three I figured it would be a good game, so I sat down at the top of the third to watch a good inning and see how the Sox would respond. Mannie came up to the plate with that wild look of his, and I thought he would smack it good. Boy was I right! Then another. Then ANOTHER! I was in hog heaven! The fourth was icing on the cake. I had the brains to back it up and Tivo it, and I am going to dump it to DVD and watch it over and over. And man, can Dice K bring the heat! I saw two dozen pitches from him in the mid 90's and at least one was 98 mph. And he had at least 6 pitches that i could see. He had a decent night against the best lineup he will face this year. Was he worth the money? Time will tell.

We can always sell him to New York.

Those are some STYLIN' shades!

I think the glasses they give out are some sort of Optometrist inside joke. The wife was diggin' these- it meant she could go outside in the light. The surgery was a success! She can see 20/40 now! "and the blind shall see".

"I see you left out the milk...."
"I see you left your dirty clothes on the floor...."
"I see you left the seat up....".

Yup. She's a visionary.

It takes a certain level of self confidence.....

This is Sheila, Hell Dog of Rocklin. She is clearly comfortable sleeping in this position. She is also confident that I will let her sleep in this position. Because I am not in bed. See, the wife loves animals, so she lets them sleep with her. This means they also sleep with me, because I will be damed if I will sleep anywhere else (and the wife would not dream of kicking the dog out of bed "it would be cruel- she is so helpless...") while some little rat takes all the covers.
The dog has tried this position while I am in the bed. It doesn't fly with me. I push her to the edge of the bed under the covers slowly, and then I eeeeaaaaasssseee her ever so gently over the edge and PLUNK! she hits the floor, where she belongs. She doesn't stay there though; she is a Jack Russell Terrier. She can jump over the fence in the yard, so jumping back into bed is no problem. She learns quickly, but she tests the limits all the time. Sounds familiar.

Anyway, while I am working, and the rest of the brood is off at school, she lies on the bed and sleeps. She snores. She also dreams. I know this because she will start barking and running in place ( really funny when she is in the position above). She always has a confused look on her face when she wakes up from a dream- I guess reality looks the same to her. Not to me.

In my dreams there are no dogs in my bed.

Pretty sad when you think about it.

Lucky me

It is an odd turn of events that cast me as the voice of reason in our household. He who thinks that starting the fire pit with huge fireballs by squirting blasts of lighter fluid onto the ebbing kindling is now the one that two combatants look to for some rational thought. I am, of course, referring to the wife and daughter.

Hell hath no fury like a fourteen year old adolescent who has had her cell phone privileges revoked. I pity the fool who prods the dragon in such a manner. Unless it's the mama dragon. Not that these two are dragons. Just women. Or, woman and “woman lite”. This whole round (think multi round prize fight) is about respect. The little woman wants respect (in the form of undergarments from Victoria's Secret). The other one (notice I did not say older, or bigger, or anything else) wants respect in the form of...well, respect. Why should the little one get Victoria's Secret when the wife gets granny pants from JCPenneys? Which pretty much means that I don't get Victoria's Secret....

But I digress.

This is going to be a long round. Having spent a fair amount of time sparring the last couple years, I can only relate that some three minute rounds can seem like an eternity. That, I think, is how this round is going to play out.

Yay for me.

Ellis Island!

My daughter is on an east coast trip with her school over the break. She is now on Ellis Island in New York. She has called us all excited and bubbly because she found one of Mary's relatives on the wall. Mary's mother had contributed to the memorial and one of the perks was to get your relative's name on the wall.

She is usually not a fan of history, or architecture, or anything not involving shopping or boys (she almost cried when she found out the Capitol Mall in DC did not have an Abercrombie- or any other stores at all). Imagine our excitement when we got the call, and her glee at this new look at history. The trip was expensive, and it is not a comfortable feeling to send your daughter off for 9 days, but I think in the long run she will be a much better person for having done it. She is exposed to history and culture in a way she never would in school. She has all her friends ( the trip has a good grade requirement, which means not a lot of boys go. Mostly girls), she has close supervision, and she has an itinerary that would not be possible with just our family. Plus, she is getting out into the world and seeing things while still being sheltered. Many kids just leap out into the world after high school and they succumb to all the distractions available- some good, some bad. Overall, I am really pleased. Score one for the 'rents.

All Geared Up!

It's that time again. Another hooligan takes to the field in full battle dress. This one, unlike his brother, is much less interested in the game, and more interested in the gear. During a recent stint as catcher, he spent most of the time during a grand slam standing off to the side of the plate admiring the stitching on his mitt. It was a watershed moment for him. He seemed to come to the realization that the glove is constructed of leather, and sewn together with strips of leather.

Later, at dinner, he asked where leather comes from. Pat, ever the educator, informed his young sibling that it comes from "cow". "just like your hamburger. That's cow too".

Connor no longer eats hamburgers. Or cows in general, for that matter. He likes chicken though. "I like cows. they are nice. Hard to like chickens though. They talk too much". Good to know. Plus, they make good nuggets.

The rest of the story....

Lest you think all was well while Mary was down with pirate patches on her eyes, let me relate a sample dinner story.

I took the kids out to Island Burger for burgers (duh). I brought my mom with me for back up- she still has the stare that stops them in their tracks. Or at least she used to.

I cannot confirm that this actually happened as related to me because I was in the bathroom trying to convince Connor to come out of the stall he had barricaded himself in, but here goes.

I was in the restroom (see above), leaving Nana, Joe and Pat at the table- Nana and the Joester on one side, and Pat across from Joe on the other. Pat looks at my mom and says something to the effect of " So you came along so that when dad has to go to the bathroom with one of us the rest aren't left alone to get in trouble, huh?" Mom says "yes, but you are such good boys I don't think there was anything to worry about". Sigh. NEVER EVER say anything that could even remotely be construed as a challenge. You can guess what happened next. Pat leans up and over the table and pops Joe in the face. Dead on. Joe submarines under the table, and proceeds to give Pat a nutcracker. Then they both return to their positions.

I return with the little one to find a serene scene thinking I should have stayed at the table and sent my mother to coax him out. Boy was I wrong.

The wife can see!

Mary had Epi Lasic. What an ordeal. It is different from regular Lasic in a couple of gruesome ways. I was able to watch (without retching!) so I will enlighten you.
First they drugged her. She was loopy. Quite alluring, I have to admit; reminded me of...well, never mind. Anyway. Then they clamped her eyes open. Very Clockwork Orange.
Then they have this arm come out and SCRAPE away the cornea. Ugh. I would have been out of the chair at that point, but then again, I can hold my meds.... Then another little machine comes into play; it clamps onto the eyeball and draws out the lens via suction. Literally. Then the laser comes on and sculpts the lens. Mary said she could smell her eyeball burning. We paid good money for this, BTW. Then they put drops and finally, a protective contact lens.

I drove her home after meeting with the doctor again. He stressed taking all the meds for pain, swelling (not a pretty mental image there...think Gene Wilder), and infection.

I have been managing the children for 5 days. I have actually done a pretty good job, but I am bushed from the wake up every 6 hours to medicate the Joester thing. I have to admit that I didn't get him his meds till 7:30 this morning. I had to sleep.

Anyway, they took the lens off today and she has 20/40 vision. She had 20/1000 before. Legally blind. Sort of explains me being in the picture, huh. I was in that semi panic but have to deal mode all weekend because there was a risk of her going blind...er. But all is well. She is SO happy. She was an incubator baby because she was a twin and they were premies. that's what they did in the 60s, and it messed up her eyes. She has been waiting for years for technology to catch up with the severity of her condition, and as soon as it did she was all over it. I am proud of her.