Tuesday, January 30, 2007

We have the cold going around.

The whole crew. Except for the wife and I. Yay for us. The school had over 70 kids call in sick, and the have been sending more home all day. Ours were sent home, one at a time. There is nothing like having all the kids home sick. It's peaceful and at the same time, sad. They are just lying around doing nothing. Based on that criteria alone, little miss teen attitude has had a cold for about two years. But she doesn't. Just has an attitude- and she's not afraid to use it.

The littlest one had a tooth pulled this morning. I didn't go because I was working, but when he came back he was like a drunken sailor. They had to knock him out to get it because it was an erupted tooth that came through the palette. Nothing is EVER simple with these kids. Anyway, he wanted to play game cube. He was having a ball and was laughing because he had two of every guy (lego star wars characters). I thought he was just high, because I have never seen the game give a player two of the same character. But lo and behold, he did! The meds enhanced his gameplay. Does not bode well for the future- I can hear it now..."but dad, it enhanced my test taking experience!? Should make for an interesting story for the principal as I walk the kid out to the car for the ride home to serve out his suspension. See what the future holds for me? Lucky me.

And the daughter is watching over my shoulder gently reminding me that I am also lucky to be able to get her a new computer. Because the old one overheated the mother board, because she wouldn't shut it off like I told her a million zillion times.... times infinity. Ugh.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

A tool too far...

I am a huge fan of tools. I buy many many many tools I will only use once, or will only use once when the right situation presents itself. That said, there should be limits. I bought a blood pressure tester because that's the kind of number I have an interest in tracking since my brother in law had bypass surgery . I started using it and was getting alarming numbers. 160/99 and the like. So I was pretty sure that I was going to die, and I began searching for an urn that fit with my design sensibilities. My wife, left to her own tastes, would end up pouring me into some ghastly country chic thing. I would die a thousand deaths. I want to be in something industrial- something that screams "toxic waste"- but would look good on the mantle.
Thankfully, Mary fell down the stairs...
...because she had to go to the hospital, and I had to drive her. While we were there, they took her blood pressure. I thought "Hey! I can get a real good idea of how long I have to live if I have a professional take my blood pressure reading! Then, if they gasp, I know I'm done for!" Or something like that.
Anyway, turns out even with all the stress of the aforementioned accident and fire drill to get to the hospital, I have a bp of 130/80. Pretty darned good. Looks like I have to continue to pump money into the 401k.
Oh, the wife has a broken ankle and will be immobilizedl for a couple weeks. Looks like I will be feeding the kids for a while.

Friday, January 19, 2007

Prayers for my brother in law

My brother in law is the first of my "peers" to suffer serious heart trouble. He had a quadruple bypass yesterday. It has had a significant effect on my life (though not nearly as much as on his life. Duh) I didn't have any ice cream last night. Don't get me wrong. I WANTED to have ice cream. I could hear it's muffled cries in the freezer. But all I could think of was the operation. They cut open your chest, split and prie apart your ribcage, and stop your heart. Then they work on it, swapping parts from your leg (arteries), splicing them in, and then they restart you. I have a project car in the garage that is undergoing a similar process. I have my doubts that I can restart it again (first time required a total rebuild of the engine). Clearly there are laws that prevent me from doing open heart surgery. If I was allowed, I would have started with the recently expired frog the boys had. Both boys. They each had about half of the frog in their respective pockets, give or take a limb. But that's another story. Anyway, I didn't have the ice cream. I am not on a health kick. I am changing course. I am one who, having learned expensive lessons from my own experiences, am totally willing to learn from the experience of others. I also have been on enough six sigma projects to know that sometimes there is a perfectly good process in place somewhere else, and I don't need to go and invent my own.
I am going back to Body For Life.

I had a lot of success with that approach years ago, but I drifted away. Now is the time to get back on track.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

"TADA!"

I was working on the addition over the weekend, and I was at the point of puting in furniture. I wanted to get the screen in the window before one of the kids decided to jump out- just for fun; that kind of stuff goes on here. I was on the bed leaning over trying to pull the screen into place. I should probably mention that the bed in the upstairs room is on wheels, and I have installed slick laminate floors. So, as I am leaning over and sort of hanging out the window, I felt the bed slide out from under me. I did a slow motion header out the window. I had placed the ladder outside the window because I wanted to scrape some stucco off the window frame, so I placed my hands on the top of the ladder. I sort of rolled over my hands and did a reverse sit up and landed feet first on the ground. It sounds good, but I really hadn't planned any of it. Needless to say, it was a truly spectacular exhibition of gymnastic skill on my part.

When you do one of these sorts of feats, it is customary to do the Nadya Komenich "pop the chest out, fling the hands up, and yell 'TADA!'" move (it's a 70's thing). I was feeling pretty damn smug, so I did the little hop, popped the arms up, and was about to go "TADA!", but was rudely interupted by the ladder, which apparently thought it too deserved some credit. Instead of a triumphant finish, I was squished onto the lawn by the ladder, which had followed my momentum and fallen over onto me.

Fortunately, I still have some time to train for the next Olympics.

Monday, January 08, 2007

Here little fishie...

We did a lot of snorkling around Maui. There are some incredible places to go and swim around and look at all the amazing fish. I took to going down to the beach by our condo every morning to go for a swim. I had bought a bunch of snorkel sets so we all could go if we wanted, and for the most part everyone did. The big exception was Pat.

his first time out he was beside himself with glee. He had a blast swimming up to the fish and staring them down- sometimes they would freak, and sometimes they would be facinated by this giant blonde kid. This went on for a long time, until we encountered a really odd looking fish. It looked like it had horns, and the fins it came with didn't look like they could power it very well. Pat zoomed up to it and blasted a bunch of air out of his mask and made his usual goofy face. The fish reacted by puffing up. It exploded to about 10 times it's size, and was all spiney and angry looking. And then IT charged PAT. It was Pat's turn to freak. He jumped up out of the water and climbed onto the only thing around. Me. He was completely on my back, and he was trying to stand up. A surfboard I am not. I tried to get him off, but he was having none of it. He let me know he was done, and he was done right then and there. Paddle in please dad.

I now know why some Orcas at ocean themed parks eat their trainers. It is no fun having someone on your back riding you like a boogie board while you try to swim and not drown.
And no, I will not jump through the hoop.